And thus forth, Artemis Fowl loved lollipops
by shaadiaThePrincessOfWeird
Summary: A collection of awesome drabbles, a lot of A/H. Please read and review! You'll love it! (probably)
1. Chapter 1: Lollipops

It was a normal evening, after all, no save the world fiascoes, no being suspected of crime, no physical activity, and, worse still, BORING.

Artemis Fowl was bored.

True, Holly had visited, but she didn't seem to have noticed this and had her head buried in some book called, "Troll picking daisies" and was giggling every five minutes. Artemis coughed. "I thought you came to visit me." The elf lifted up her head. A white stick was poking out of her mouth. "Arty, give me a minute,"she mumbled unclearly.

"And you're reading a kid's story book while sucking a lollipop!"

Holly grinned at him. "It's tasty."

"I don't like lollipops."

"Because it's tasty?"

"It's the exact opposite!"

"No, it's not. When was the last time you tasted a lollipop?"

Artemis paused to think. That had been a good question. "When I was two. Believe it or not, I puked afterwards. It was simply disgusting."

Holly rolled her eyes. "Oh, I believe it alright." She put the book aside, and slid off the bed sideways. "How about one more try?"

"No, Captain. I detest the mere thought of those things ruining my taste buds, and it is not healthy, as-"

He was unable to continue his speech, as it was at that moment Holly pulled the lollipop out of her mouth, and poked it in his.

"For me?"she whispered, leaning into him.

Artemis instantly felt color come to his cheeks. For some reason, he couldn't lift his hand to take it out. And at the same time he realized that Holly had been sucking the very same thing only a few moments ago.

The elf moved closer, and slowly, pulled it out, and then into her own mouth.

"This-This is ridiculous!" spluttered Artemis. "Holly, that was not funny!"

"It was worth it, seeing you blush like that,"argued Holly, laughing.

"I didn't–what did you do that for?!"

"To prove my point. Mind another go at it?"

The human shook his head. "No. I refuse to-"

Too late. It was already back in his own mouth.

Holly hugged him tightly. "I'm enjoying this,"she grinned.

Artemis felt a wave of realization strike him.

"Uh…Holly?"

"Yes?"

"I-I think I like lollipops."

_And from that day forth, Artemis Fowl liked Lollipops…_


	2. how to mke an elf do what you want

Artemis Fowl was having a not-going-as-planned conversation with a certain totally-unpredictable-and-seriously-scary-but-tota lly-hot elf.

"For the fifteenth damn time, Fowl, I am NOT going to help you convince your mother to make you stop wearing jeans! It's not my fault anyway you got into this mess."

`"Do me a favor, Holly. Please."

Holly grinned. "Say that word again."

"Please," groaned Artemis. "PLEASE."

"And you have to admit that you lost to Foaly at chess last week."

Artemis snorted. "Preposterous."

"Or else I won't do it!"

"Fine." Artemis took a deep breath. "Ilosttothatdamnedcentaurbecausehewassayingcrapabo ut–"

"Clearly."

"I lost it."

"The whole sentence, Arty."

Artemis sighed. "I lost to Foaly because he said that if I didn't lose he'd lie to you and-"

"Interesting. You may proceed."

"He said he'll tell Holly that I like Lilli Frond, and-"

"You don't, do you?" asked Holly, glaring at him.

"Don't be ridiculous."

"Okay, I'll do it if you say the sixteen times table backwards, from hundred while eating a lollipop and standing on one foot with roller skates on."

"What!"

"Arty, if you really want to see your beloved suits again…"

Artemis swallowed. _Imagine what she'd get me to do when I get a chance to ask her out._

Artemis Fowl was having a not-going-as-planned conversation with a certain totally-unpredictable-and-seriously-scary-but-tota lly-hot elf.

"For the fifteenth damn time, Fowl, I am NOT going to help you convince your mother to make you stop wearing jeans! It's not my fault anyway you got into this mess."

`"Do me a favor, Holly. Please."

Holly grinned. "Say that word again."

"Please," groaned Artemis. "PLEASE."

"And you have to admit that you lost to Foaly at chess last week."

Artemis snorted. "Preposterous."

"Or else I won't do it!"

"Fine." Artemis took a deep breath. "Ilosttothatdamnedcentaurbecausehewassayingcrapabo ut–"

"Clearly."

"I lost it."

"The whole sentence, Arty."

Artemis sighed. "I lost to Foaly because he said that if I didn't lose he'd lie to you and-"

"Interesting. You may proceed."

"He said he'll tell Holly that I like Lilli Frond, and-"

"You don't, do you?" asked Holly, glaring at him.

"Don't be ridiculous."

"Okay, I'll do it if you say the sixteen times table backwards, from hundred while eating a lollipop and standing on one foot with roller skates on."

"What!"

"Arty, if you really want to see your beloved suits again…"

Artemis swallowed. _Imagine what she'd get me to do when I get a chance to ask her out._

Artemis Fowl was having a not-going-as-planned conversation with a certain totally-unpredictable-and-seriously-scary-but-tota lly-hot elf.

"For the fifteenth damn time, Fowl, I am NOT going to help you convince your mother to make you stop wearing jeans! It's not my fault anyway you got into this mess."

`"Do me a favor, Holly. Please."

Holly grinned. "Say that word again."

"Please," groaned Artemis. "PLEASE."

"And you have to admit that you lost to Foaly at chess last week."

Artemis snorted. "Preposterous."

"Or else I won't do it!"

"Fine." Artemis took a deep breath. "Ilosttothatdamnedcentaurbecausehewassayingcrapabo ut–"

"Clearly."

"I lost it."

"The whole sentence, Arty."

Artemis sighed. "I lost to Foaly because he said that if I didn't lose he'd lie to you and-"

"Interesting. You may proceed."

"He said he'll tell Holly that I like Lilli Frond, and-"

"You don't, do you?" asked Holly, glaring at him.

"Don't be ridiculous."

"Okay, I'll do it if you say the sixteen times table backwards, from hundred while eating a lollipop and standing on one foot with roller skates on."

"What!"

"Arty, if you really want to see your beloved suits again…"

Artemis swallowed. _Imagine what she'd get me to do when I get a chance to ask her out._


	3. Chapter 3: Unicorns!

"...No Fowl, get it over there! THERE! Are you deaf or something?"

Artemis snorted. "Foaly, you asked me to help with your project, and if you'd mentioned carrying around your frond damn boxes-"

"That's helping a lot, Arty." the centaur secretly chuckled. This was turning out to be a pretty interesting experiment so far.

Holly threw aside one of Foaly's gadgets she'd been asked to carry. "What are you trying to invent, anyway?"

Foaly smirked. "I've decided to clone an extinct creature, with the faked DNA samples Dr Argon gave me."

Artemis raised a doubtful eyebrow. 'And this creature is?"

"A Unicorn."

There was a brief silence, then suddenly the elf and the human burst into roars of laughter.

"What?"protested Foaly. "I'm being serious!"

Holly whispered something into the Mud Boy's ear, and they started laughing again.

The centaur scowled. "Well, if you're done with the flirting and stuff-"

"WHAT!"

"Shall I explain how this works?"

"Just make it happen,"smirked Holly. "Go on, make a unicorn, my little pony fan boy."

"Don't call me a-!"

"Start it, will you?"

Foaly clip clopped towards his weird gadget, lovingly patting the device. "This," he said, "Is called the-"

"I don't think I want to hear this," said Artemis, grinning. "Your naming scheme was never very impressive."

Foaly ignored him, wordlessly switching it on. "Now, we wait. Three hours maximum."

Holly groaned. "Should it take so long?"

"Look, to get a good result, you need time! Ever heard of patience?"

Artemis shook his head. "Captain, we best spend our time productively. Your suggestion?"

The elf's face lit up. "How about the Cinema?"

"Sounds fine."

Foaly watched them leave. "Lovebirds," he muttered disapprovingly.

...

Three hours later

"Is the unicorn ready, pony boy?" Artemis asked, mockingly pronouncing the word "unicorn".

Foaly glared at him. "Yes, and here it is!"

Holly observed the figure carefully. "Ummm...would you mind taking off all the wires?"

Foaly took off the wires.

They stared, then started laughing again, this time much louder, even tearing.

"What?" snapped Foaly.

"Nice rat," commented Artemis.

The centaur looked back at his creation.

Fowl was not joking...


	4. Chapter 4: Video Editing Fun

**Foaly and Mulch think of ways to annoy Artemis.**

"NO!" shouted the centaur. "That will not work! Honestly, a rotten chunk of Dwarf Cheese under his pillow?!"

"Well then think of something better!" challenged Mulch. "Go on!"

Foaly took three minutes, and finally came up with, "I have a plan."

**Fowl Manor, Ireland**

Beckett, Myles, Artemis and Holly were seated in a circle, holding hands. It was a stupid game, according to Artemis, but according to the other three, it was "awesome and you're too sissy to do it".

They were playing Ouch.

The person near you hits you hard on the palm. Scream and you're out. And of course, Artemis would have gotten out in the first round itself if it hadn't been for Holly going easy on him. And obviously it didn't hurt the elf when either of the five year olds hit.

Then, Holly got frustrated with the never ending game and slapped him hard on the palm. A bit too hard, which caused Artemis to nearly jump in pain. And yes, he screamed.

"Arty, I'm so sorry! I just..."

"Please, Captain! Do you have to continue this ridiculous children's game?"

Holly sighed, ruffling Beckett's hair. "Okay boys, gotta go. Sorry."

They grumbled and left the room.

~!~!00~!~~

Much to Artemis's horror, he now found himself pinned to the bed with a chuckling elf above him.

"Go on, Arty, say it!"

"No!"

"SAY IT OR I'LL HIT YOU AGAIN!"

Artemis sighed. "I like...love cheesecake."

Holly laughed, drawing in closer. "And?"

"And I find Holly Short extremely annoying."

"Uh huh?"

"And I am about to push you off of me, right now."

"Try me."

Artemis tried pushing her aside, but unfortunately it just caused her to loose her balance and fall on top of him.

Foaly was in hysterics. He had told Holly to bug Fowl about the cheesecake thing, but that last bit was just too good to be true.

He edited the video and sent an email to Artemis.

"I love Holly Short," said the Mud Boy, and tried pulling her closer. This was where the clever editing was. In reality ,they'd just bumped their foreheads but in this, it looked darn well like a kiss.

Needless to say, the next day it was posted on Horse and within twenty six minutes, had one million five hundred thirty eight views and the same amount of comments, amount which said.

**Artemis Fowl: You will pay for this, Donkey Boy.**

_**YAY DONE! For now. Please look at Regards from my past, present and future. It's another fic of mine.**_

_**Please review!**_


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